I am going back to university in a week. After eight years and two kids. Gosh, I haven’t felt this unprepared since the day before my first was born. I quite frankly have no idea what I am getting into.
I look like I could fit in, because I actually, so they say, look younger than I am. In fact, during my interview, the person interviewing me thought I lived with my parents. Wrong: I have my very own house, a husband and two kids. I feel like a fake, though. Over three years of little to no sleep make me feel old. Really old.
This morning, I was off to campus to get my student card and walk around campus a bit. I thought, “Look at me with this cool backpack that has a special pocket for my laptop and a special place for my iPod.” The very fact that I thought that makes me cool proves I am not. Remember, though, eight years ago, I was still walking around campus with paper notebooks.
I packed a snack before I left, because I cannot spend a whole morning without snacking. Breastfeeding five times a day (and night) makes me ravenously hungry. So, I packed my snack. In Baby Cubes and First Years containers. I almost reached for the kids lunch bag very colourful bag until I realised I bought my very own pretty lunch bag a while back.
Once I was out of the house, I realised I didn’t have my hand sanitizer. “That’s okay, I have baby wipes.” I thought. Then I remembered I had my backpack, not my diaper bag. I can’t even remember the last time I have left the house without a diaper bag.
As I was waiting in line for my student card, I was almost the only one not playing around with a cell phone. I have one just for emergencies with the kids, but I have no idea how to text. What if my fellow students want to text me for projects?
The best part of my morning, other than the fact that I did not get lost on campus? I asked if there was a place I could pump my milk if need be, and the girl at the information booth said, “Of course, there is a room for that, just ask for the key!” Awesome!
Please tell me I am not the only one who has those moments when you realise Mommyhood has made you uncool.